Els Vredeveldt (31) is buddy to Ismail (9). A few times a month she picks him up from his parents' house in West. They always go out together. Climbing trees, for example.
"In the beginning, kids in the neighborhood asked who I was. Are you Ismail's teacher? they asked. I looked at Ismail and asked, 'yes, what am I to you anyway?' He didn't have to think long and said, 'you are the shelter.'"
We've known each other for a year now. Through De Regenboog Groep, I became his buddy. I could choose from three children. Ismail was looking for someone who loved animals and nature. I thought: that would suit me. I also like being outside. Children should be climbing trees, not sitting inside.
Ismail's father is ill. Els doesn't know exactly what he has, but she suspects depression. He sleeps a lot. Ismail's mother is at work all week, and his two older sisters are busy with their own lives as well. If Els didn't visit, Ismail would be inside a lot. A shame, Els thinks. "Ismail is a very smart and curious little boy. Such a little boy naturally wants to discover the world. The other day he was standing on top of a climbing frame, shouting with clenched fist: 'Els, look...I am king of the world!'
I love that little man's optimism. I learn a lot from that. I give him Els confidence, he always says. Then I say, 'You're doing it yourself. All by yourself!"
Though it was not easy in the beginning to gain his trust and that of the family. Ismail has been through a lot. Also at school. He is regularly bullied. Do you know what he said when I stood at his door the very first time: 'Can you be trusted...?' I thought it was a great question, but remarkable for an eight-year-old child. Within a few weeks, we became the thickest of buddies."
Ismail is a pseudonym
Interview: Nicolline van der Spek / Photo: Merlin Michon